How important is an organization like Safe Space NOVA to the LGBT+ youth community?

Safe Space is very important, because it gives our LGBT+ youth community a chance to socialize and identify with others like themselves. And that doesn’t just mean where you fall on the spectrum, as I honestly don’t feel that’s as important as it is to realize that we are one big community full of all kinds of people in and of itself. We all have walked different paths than the cisgender/heterosexual community, but I still think that you need to learn about interpersonal relationships within your own community and how to build those relationships at an early age.

How important do you think it is to target the 14-18 year old range?

Having segued into “early age” I’d like to first talk about what we didn’t have when I was growing up as a teenager in the “Gay Community” as we called it back then. In fact, we were afraid to even say the word out loud as that would then make it true. That would then make all of the pain and suffering we feared about going through (but really already were going through) a reality. As a Cis Gay man, I at tried having “pretend girlfriends” to just fit in wherever I could in my teenage years. People used lots of horrible words to describe Gays/Lesbians/Transgender people in those days, you were best to stay in the closet and just secretly “hook up” with other guys via online service chatrooms (which were nothing like the dating apps of today’s world, though equally as scary and dangerous), to find out if you really were “into the same sex”. Even then you still lived in denial. By the time you came out in your early/mid 20’s, the social damage was already done. Drugs unfortunately still are rampant in the community. I believe there is still lot’s of healing that needs to happen with LGBT+ people in my age group (I will be 40 years old this year). So, based on the situation I am describing here, you can see why it’s so important to integrate youth into the community at an early age, and to open the discussion about a wide range of things that affect us. For this very reason, I try to get involved wherever I can to make sure each young queer person has the tools they need to grow and thrive in this world. My generation and the generation before me literally fought and died for it.

What are some of the challenges and roadblocks that you have personally faced within the LGBT+ community and how do you think Safe Space NOVA can help break down any barriers?

I described much of the answer to this in question 3, however I will now talk about how this all affected me. As a small child, I was a sexual/physical abuse victim and was already struggling with issues I couldn’t even begin to deal with. In my teens I found my first “Gay Club/Bar” and immediately fell into the wrong crowd. It was so nice to be accepted, and I quickly got whisked away into a fast lifestyle of party drugs and unsafe sex. Many people around me became infected with HIV/AIDS and some even died because of this. I can’t begin to tell you how many older members of our community have literally watched half of their friends die. Those affected were treated like they were garbage and a biohazard to the public. The pain still cuts deep, and I have to constantly correct older people when they unintentionally tell the HIV/AIDS story wrong or perpetuate stereotypes that are not true. While this crisis was a horrible ordeal, it also made our community more of a family that started to learn to look out for one another.

Have you personally dealt with or witnessed someone firsthand deal with the issues in the LGBT+ community that Safe Space NOVA is aiming to prevent (depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation, drug abuse, etc.)?

I myself am in recovery from drugs and alcohol, I suffer from depression and anxiety like many people. In my earlier days, I had multiple suicide attempts like many of my friends. We mostly felt like we had to just “live it up and get high” because our lives would never be as full and complete as the heterosexual community. I now realize that this was just a bigger excuse to continue to self medicate and be reckless with my life by making poor choices. Safe Space is VITAL for this very reason! I cannot stress that enough. If I can share why I and others like me went through this to help someone else avoid this pain and heartache altogether, then I have done my job. My only hope is that the younger LGBT+ Community never forgets that we are all one community. Whether you are Gay, Lesbian, Transgender, Gender-Non Conforming, Genderqueer or still Questioning where you fall in that whole spectrum. At the end of the day, how you love and accept others will be what truly defines your character. You will still be faced with ignorance and injustice, and I wish I could spare you from that, but how you respond to it and grow from the experience will determine your outcome.