March 16, 2021
Q&A with Gavin Parker
Q: How important is an organization like Safe Space NOVA to the LGBT+ youth community?
A: I think that organizations like Safe Space NOVA are incredibly important for the sense of community, sense of belonging, and a resource for young LGBTQ+ people. Oftentimes the journey of being queer is done alone through lack of community and resources to youth in middle and high schools around the country. Providing and maintaining these healthy community spaces and contacts can help drastically reduce the fear and uncertainty of being queer and finding who you are and where you fit in.
Q: How important do you think it is to target the 14-18 year old range?
A: The 14-18 year old range is right smack in the middle of puberty when life is confusing and awkward and weird anyway, but especially if you are queer and not like the majority of your peers. It was always a struggle trying to question “was this reaction normal?” or “do all gay guys feel or experience this?” when I only had either female or straight male friends who were all sharing similar experiences with each other. Giving a space to that age group to have those questions answered or at least feel like they aren’t going through that alone is monumental in self-worth, confidence, and feeling like they don’t have to solely trust internet searches and forums for answers.
Q: What are some of the challenges and roadblocks that you have personally faced within the LGBT+ community and how do you think Safe Space NOVA can help break down any barriers?
A: Personally I have felt at odds with a lot of the community as my overall personality is quieter, I’m more of an observer than a performer, and I don’t like drawing attention to myself all that much which I know a lot (but not all, I know I’m not alone) of the LGBTQ+ community is proudly out and loud about it. Power to them but that just doesn’t sit well with me, to be in the spotlight for any real reason. I also am decently involved with athletics and love sports and competition, which isn’t the stereotypical “gay” field of interest, and it almost always is assumed I work for sports teams because of sexual motivations, especially from other queer members. I extremely dislike that anything to do with what are commonly “straight” or more masculine activities can be seen that way instead of simply a passion or lifelong interest. I was an athlete from toddler through high school and have continued loving sports, nothing sexual about it yet I find myself repeatedly having to prove that to other LGBTQ+ people more often than I do to non-LGBTQ+. I think having NOVA as a Safe Space would provide a place where people can come to meet people with varying volumes of personality, from the super loud and outgoing to the silent and introverted as well as helping to reduce the stigma around being ‘too proud’ or ‘not proud enough.’ It also helps by giving people real connections with queer people who are artists, who are athletes, scientists, writers, etc. and remove associations from professions and hobbies.
Q: Have you personally dealt with or witnessed someone firsthand deal with the issues in the LGBT+ community that Safe Space NOVA is aiming to prevent (depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation, drug abuse, etc.)?
A: I have depression and anxiety garnered through life experience and trauma unrelated to being LGBTQ+, though being queer was not the cause of them it definitely has exacerbated them in some instances. Most of my friends who are queer has anxiety or depression or both, and several are addicted to nicotine in various forms, though I am also just out of college so some of that is definitely attributable to that environment as well. It is definitely a hard path and being LGBTQ+ makes it harder as you find less social acceptance and fewer resources to turn to for these situations, and often the fear of different/lesser treatment that comes with being a part of a minority group can impact as well, even if it is unfounded in a lot of places. Obviously, none of this includes racial or financial factors that can make these even harder to treat and exacerbate them more, I am a white middle class male, and I think making sure to provide a space for the black LGBTQ+, for the Hispanic, for the Trans and non-binary, and for those without the finances to do private work is something that cannot be understated or forgotten about.
Instagram: gav_bparker
Outsports Article: https://www.outsports.com/2019/12/4/20994198/gavin-parker-connecticut-ice-hockey-gay-coming-out